So I did just that I finished out my associates degree that I started right out of high school and transferred to Syracuse University’s nursing program. 

My first job was on a medical-surgical telemetry floor – this meant I cared for a hodge podge of patients – patients recovering after getting their appendix out to patients that were on ventilators but too stable for the ICU. On that unit I learned to to comfort grieving families and even held the hand of a patient as she took her last breath.

After my first year a position opened up on labor and delivery- this is where I really wanted to be. I applied and because of my skills with my heart patients and reading a heart monitor I got the job. 

Because of Azaria and her loss – I was drawn to help those families that were going through the nightmare of losing a baby. I have walked along side countless families in this situation- some I am still friends with today.

I have been an advocate standing up for my patients even if that meant getting in a minor tiff with a physician or administration over what was best.

I have  been able to help our families create memories of their babies-including pictures .

I have worked in a perinatal hospice program which met with families who knew that their baby was not going to survive but chose life anyways.

I have had the honor to be a speaker at conferences that educated fellow nurses on how to care for families going through loss.

Even in my role as a nurse practitioner in recent years- I have been able to listen and give patients hope as they tell me their stories of loss.

Some of my experiences are hard to put into the perfect words but I can say even though losing Azaria was one of the hardest moments in my life- Her life was not in vain. She has gifted me with purpose and with God’s grace I will do all I can to fulfill it.